An Alcoholic's Resolution

Some fun in Ottava Rima for New Year's. Apologies to George.

I want a beer: oh, an uncommon want,

  When every New Year’s Eve sends forth a slew,

Which I demolish in some favourite haunt,

   To bid the last twelve months a fond adieu;

But when I wake up, wracked with pain, and gaunt,

   I swear I’ll never sup another brew — 

So pounding is my headache New Year’s Day,

That only beer can make it go away...

An Unexpected Gift

An allegory so thinly veiled, I might as well have cling-filmed it.

I received an unexpected gift

early one morning

I opened the door, and there she was:

A little white kitten.

I called her “Snowy”.

When she was young,

Snowy was fun

and fluffy and playful.

I'd say we frolicked,

but that is such a loaded word.

But almost overnight,

I woke up to find that

Snowy's heart had turned to ice.

She'd stick her cold claws into my fingers,

get under my feet,

& try & trip me up

& break my neck

at every

available

opportunity.

I fucken hate Snowy.